Struggling

September 22, 2004 3:16 p.m.

It never fails. I had an exceptionally good loss last week, so of course I had to go and try to ruin it. And I'm still TRYING to ruin it.

It started out innocently enough - I was just too lazy to cook, and it had been a while since we'd had fast food. We debated whether or not to get Whoppers (those advertising bastards!) but decided on Taco Bell because it would be cheaper, and it was much closer.

I ordered a Double Decker Taco and Soft Taco - both with meat and cheese only. And a side of Pintos & Cheese. 14 points total.

But I didn't feel satisfied.

DH agreed he was still hungry too, so off I went to McDonald's for some double cheeseburgers. With sides of small fries. 19 points total crap.

Now I sit 11 FPs in the hole, which really isn't bad - but the problem is that I want more. Doesn't matter what, just MORE. Things were going great, and for whatever reason I have yet to figure out, I'm not satisfied.

Before I re-joined WW, I was at the point where I wasn't paying attention to what I was eating, but I certainly wasn't eating entire pizzas or numerous hamburgers and gigantic shakes like so many people think people my size do. I wasn't eating healthy, but I really wasn't eating much. (I've never ate a LOT, just always ate the wrong things and too often). Now I feel like eating like They think I eat.

I know it's because of my loss this week. I've lost 14 lbs, which isn't significant but it's getting close to the time where it can be considered a good-sized number. I don't know what that number is, but it's getting close.

I hate this feeling. But I'm going to guzzle my water and pat myself on the back because by writing these feelings out, I've managed to use up 5 minutes of my time and put things into perspective.

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